Where is the guy I married?

“Wiiiiiieeeeeeennnn, wieeeeeeeeeeeeeeen, wieeeeeennnnnennnn,” my baby’s cry went on and on.

“Jesus, please make her stop. Please calm her down. What could be wrong with her now?” I kept muttering to myself as I sat up and held my three-month-old baby in my arms. She was crying profusely. Tears dotted her face like little puddles of water. She didn’t want to be appeased. She even refused to be breastfed. What should I do?

I climbed out of bed and danced around while singing lullabies to her, but instead of calming down, Blossom kept crying.

“Could it be her diapers?” I asked myself. I went to her wardrobe and grabbed another diaper. I returned to the bed, sat down, removed all of her clothes, and headed to the bathroom.

After giving Blossom a warm bath, I returned to the bedroom to dress her in a light, comfortable sleeper, after applying enough powder on her body and oil on her scalp. Yet, the crying continued. I was frustrated.

I brought her close to my chest, ready to breastfeed, but her little hands pulled my blouse down as if to say, “I don’t want your milk!” And she cried even louder!

We had been to the hospital earlier that day for the antenatal checkup. The last vaccination wasn’t like this! Though she cried, it wasn’t as bad as this. I had been told to expect this incessant crying, but I didn’t anticipate it would be this intense. I gently lifted her blouse and checked her small shoulder, which seemed to be the source of her discomfort. I rubbed it over and over again, but she cried even more. I put my baby down, knelt beside my bed, and cried!

Is this what motherhood is like? God, this is unbearable! I cried and cried.

You might be wondering, where is your husband? Is your baby fatherless? My dear people, no! My husband is alive, he is safe and sound.

Throughout this whole ordeal, Dave slept so peacefully as if nothing was happening. My baby’s tears and my own—they were like lullabies to him, urging him to sleep on.

This wasn’t the man I married!

When I first got married to him, my sleeplessness affected him too. Whenever I turned on my side in bed, he would wake up, no matter how deep his sleep was. He would cuddle me and sing into my ears until I fell asleep. But now, he didn’t even budge.

He turned in his sleep and sat up. I looked at him and shook my head.

“Dear, are you just…” I was saying this when he interrupted me.

“What’s all the noise about?” he asked, still half-asleep.

I looked at him intensely, my heart beating fast. Couldn’t he see my tears? Couldn’t he see that I needed some words of encouragement?

“Are you crying?” he asked, yawning, scratching his head, and looking away. My already swollen heart shattered, and I burst into loud sobs.

“Dave, where are you? What is happening? Where is my husband? What has happened to us?” I cried out. He shook his head, let out a brief hiss, got out of bed, picked up a pillow, and left the room!

My crying abruptly stopped!

“Is this a dream?” I asked myself.

I couldn’t take it anymore. I carefully placed my dozing baby in her small cradle and rushed out of the room as if being chased by a jackal!

Dave was on the couch, supporting himself with the pillow and some other throw pillows. He

was snoring! He looked so unconcerned.

One voice told me to slap him awake, while another voice told me, ‘Liz, take it easy.’ I obeyed the latter, approached him, knelt down beside him, and tapped him gently.

“Ohhh, Liz, what is it? It’s midnight. Let me sleep! Otherwise, let me sleep!” he said.

‘I won’t cry!’ I told myself. I called upon my Spirit, Soul, and Body to fight this battle together.

“Dave, what’s wrong? Didn’t you hear Blossom crying so heavily?” I asked.

“Of course, I heard her. But you know, cuddle her, sing to her, do everything. She will eventually fall asleep.”

“Yes, I have tried everything, but nothing worked. I think it’s because of the vaccination.”

“Well, if it didn’t work when you tried, what makes you think it will work if I try? Liz, let’s be reasonable!” he said. I blinked hard to prevent tears from falling.

“You could still show some care, Dave. You’re supposed to show me some care,” I said, but my eyes failed me as I started crying again. Dave hissed!

“Listen, Liz, this crying is irritating! Grow up! What’s the difference between you and Blossom? When a grown-up behaves like a baby, she becomes an imbecile!” he blurted out. I sat on the cold tiles, picked up one of the throw pillows, and started banging it on the floor, hoping that this experience would wake me up from this nightmare. My head started throbbing with pain.

“Dave, I have lost you! Jesus, I have lost my husband!” I cried out repeatedly.

Our marriage is only a year old. What is happening? During my pregnancy, when I acted like a sobbing child, he would cuddle me and call me “my baby with my baby,” wiping my tears away. Now, this isn’t even an act, and it irritates him. It doesn’t pain him, it doesn’t concern him! What has suddenly come over him?

He had been acting strange and absurd for many days now, but now it’s getting out of hand.

I approached him and sat beside him. I held his hand, which he reluctantly allowed. I let out a sigh.

“Dave, please, let’s pray. I sense that something is wrong,” I said. He pulled his hands away, hissed, and stood up.

“Don’t bring prayers into something like this. Why are you being illogical? If you can’t leave me alone, I’ll leave the house!” he said, slipping on his shoes and heading towards the door.

As he was about to open it, I blocked his way.

Where is he going? It’s just a few minutes before midnight. Not tonight! God forbid!” I thought to myself.

I looked into his face, and my heart longed for my husband, but his eyes scared me. They were red like burning coals. My heart started racing.

I cried out as he grabbed my right hand and forcefully pushed me out of his way into one of the armchairs. It was so painful.

He turned the key twice, and the door opened. There was a loud bang as he closed the door behind him.

“Jesus! This can’t be your will, right? But you told me it was Dave and no one else. That’s why I said yes. You did! What is happening now?…Oh God!”

I could cry no more. The veins at the sides of my head throbbed, creating so much noise that it disturbed me! My head was pounding as if someone was hammering yam in

it. I was exhausted. My nose was blocked! My eyes were heavy.

Where is my caring, loving, prayerful, and peace-loving husband and father of Blossom? This person before me is clearly not him!

Where is my husband? Can someone just tell me where he is?

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